80 days/ 1,920 hours/ 115,200 minutes/ 6,912,000 seconds.

That is the amount of time my love has been gone.  Those hours, minutes and seconds have passed us by with a huge place that cannot be filled. But, (and here comes the good part) more importantly, that is the amount of time my love has been face to face with the creator of the universe.  The all powerful, all knowing, all loving God. I can hardly wrap my mind around that. That Zac right now is with Jesus.

I keep receiving wonderful e-mails, cards words of encouragement from so many people, it has been wonderful.  I have been back to work at NewSpring, I am so happy to be there and to be back . The love and support I have at NewSpring is wonderfully overwhelming. I think back to all that has happened and I cannot imagine doing this anywhere else. What happened this past year was hard. We as a family struggled through the continual pain and ultimate death of our husband/father. It brings me joy to look back on that time and see how God has used NewSpring to blessing our family. Also, how they all have continued to shower love and goodness on my family, during this time of restoration.  I love you all so much. Really and truly I do!

More importantly, the video. The awesome people at NewSpring, took the time and resources to make a beautiful video. A video that I hope you all  have seen. A video detailing  Zac’s faith in Christ and willingness for God to use him for His glory.  A video from which I have had countless e-mails and letters stating that peoples lives are forever changed. To God be the glory!! I could shout this from the rooftops every time I hear another example of what God has done.

God has taken this thing(cancer) that satan intended to be hurtful, ugly and cruel. And you know what he did? He took that ugliness and made it beautiful.  That is what He is all about. Death to life, pain to healing, cancer to glory and restoration!  Only our God could do something so wonderful. I am so honored he is using my family and all of you…to fill up His kingdom.

I am so excited to see what God has next for us on this journey. I am also excited that, on the day  when I too am looking face to face with Jesus, however many days, hours, minutes, or second from now that may be.  I get to see all of the people that this ugly thing called cancer ,that was perfected and made beautiful by our Savior, brought from death to life.

Would you like to know more about NewSpring? Check out www.newspring.cc

How about Zac’s Story? Go to http://vimeo.com/9796056

About The Author



24 Responses to “Time”

  1. Lance Patterson says:

    Someday you’ll be reunited where time shall be no more. This is a wonderful testimony, Mandy. God bless you and your children. We continue to pray for you.

  2. Neil Schori says:


    Thanks for your enduring spirit and your faithfulness to Jesus through such a tough time in your life. I’m praying for you and your children tonight and thanking God for Zac’s powerful example.

    Tomorrow I will be answering tough questions about suffering at my church, and I will be using Zac’s story and video as an incredible example of suffering well. I’m confident that God will use it in my congregation to help all of us to learn to do the same.

    Peace & Prayers,


  3. Briang says:

    God is so good and He keeps getting better the more hind-sight I have:

    Zac wanted to travel the world in order to impact people…he’s STILL doing this through the video!

    Zac wanted to marry his tech skills/love with his love for the church…he did that through Newspring & his work is STILL working!

    Zac wanted to preach to the masses…he STILL does this through his blog and the video!

    Zac wanted to give his family a wonderful home and wonderful community…I don’t know of a better place than Newspring and the upstate of South Carolina!

    I’m with you Mandy…TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!!!

    • zac says:

      Brian, what you just said is exactly how I feel. I love it. All of those times Z felt like God was leading him to something more…those are being accomplished. Thank you for the love you and your wife have shown to me and the kids. We just love the Goodban’s and I know Z sure did too! Thank you for your words of truth. Perfection.

  4. Mama Dalton says:

    Mandy, I don’t know how we continue to miss each other so completely. It’s not like we’re in a big church or anything (you know my entire family except me!). But I feel that we are close because I adopted Zac so completely through our Son, and, as God chose to put him in my daily devotional time (many days whether I expected him to be or not!), and to give me scripture to send to him.

    Over my last two years of coming so much closer to God in my own brokenness, the one thing that has impacted me more than anything else is how little I understood of who he really was, how passionate he was about loving me, and that he would do anything, anything, to prove that to me. I think that Zac showed that to us in such a profound and completely unexpected way, that the message was not only heard and seen by others, it was felt.

    We can only experience God’s profound, passionate, persistent love if we trust him–through whatever life dishes out. And Zac figured that out, and he taught us that–because he was completely, in intimate, profound, passionate, and persistent love with Jesus. And he knew he would continue to speak not only through the video. He knew he would speak through you, and the kids. And he does.

    Whether it takes a Road to Damascus experience or not, being in love with Jesus, and his church is glorious, GLORIOUS! We are so grateful that you have been here with us, and that you remain. Someday, we need to get together!

    • zac says:

      We sure do miss each other, I saw your husband but not you. Thank you for your encouragement It means so much to mean to hear what you had to say… We do need to get together. Your awesome son and daughter-in-law came over last night and I just love them so much!!

  5. Leo Gallant says:

    Thank-you for living face to face with Jesus and showing us what it is to know that God is still good. So good to hear the support from NewSpring abounds! Your testimony reminds me of the song I just wrote. You can listen at my blog if you like.

  6. Jeanette says:

    You’re a wonderful and faithful person Amanda! So many people have been touched by you and your family. Truly amazing to see!! Just curious – do you still check your @zacsmith email address? I’ve been hoping to hear from you.

    • zac says:

      Jeanette! I do still check it from time to time. I have a work e-mail that I check more often. We DO need to catch up. Can I give you a call? E-mail me again your # I would love to hear how you are doing.

  7. Mark A Laloo, Shillong,India says:

    Hi Mandy, my elder bro sent me a link of Zacs’ Video….Amazing faith !!! God really created a special person in Zac. Despite the pain he endured,he was faithful till the end and i am sure his story melted the hearts of many like me.Mandy, your seperation from him is temporary as our residence in this world is but temporary.Surely Zac is waiting for you and your kids and waiting for an eternal reunion in the special place that God created for his own.I may be from a very far off country and a place that you never heard of but believe me, our God is the same and Zacs’ story really took me to a new level in faith.To God be all the glory.RIP Zac and God be with you and your kids( family) Mandy……Hard as it may sound to believe but i am sure that anyone who comes across Zacs’ story will become inclined towards having a better relationship with God so that when their time to leave the world comes, they will be ready!Praise God for everything.

    • zac says:

      Praise God for everything is right! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. I am so thankful that God can use this video to His glory and for His purpose. So good to hear from you.

  8. Sara Potter says:

    Hi Mandy, I was first made aware of your story through Kelly’s Korner blog. I shared the story with some friends back then but Zac’s video continues to stay in my head and my heart. Tomorrow (Sunday, August 29) my husband will be sharing Zac’s video with our Sunday School class. We are praying that his video will impact our group as much as it has impacted David and I. Thank you for continuing to be a light for Jesus through such a heartbreaking time for you. After seeing the video tomorrow, I am sure that there will be some in our group that will be interested in the rest of your story. I am so thankful that you have continued this blog. Thank you for your transparency and for continuing to proclaim God’s goodness in all things.

  9. Sara Potter says:

    We were able to share Zac’s video today in our Sunday School class. People were directed to the blog to read more of his story.Thank you for being so transparent with your faith and your struggles. God is God and God is good… all the time.

    • zac says:

      I am so happy you were able to share Zac’s video. That is so wonderful to hear. God is good all of the time, for that I am so thankful! Good to hear from you.

  10. Todd Sitcler says:


    I’m 31 years old. I have a wife (Candy) and 2 boys (5 and 7) and I am a youth pastor.

    The story of your family has changed my life. It makes me ask, “How can I be a better husband? How can I be a better dad? What legacy am I leaving for them?” My family is my first and most important ministry. I don’t want to squander what God has given to me. I want to have an impact on their lives to where they dream incredible dreams and credit God for all of it.

    If I were half the spouse and parent you are, I’d consider myself successful.

    • zac says:

      Todd, thank you so much for your encouragement! I love that you are thinking about how to put your family first. So important and it sounds like you are doing that! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. God bless you and your family.

  11. deborah says:

    Hope this finds you trusting and rejoicing – post when you can,

  12. Elmer says:

    I just wanted to say that I am sorry for all the pain that you and your family are going through. I know how hard it is. We lost our daughter Randi to cancer on 2-19-07. We just celebrated her 23rd birthday this week.

    God is good and HE is awesome.



  13. Nicki says:

    I followed a link to the video of Zac’s life. A friend of mine had posted it on facebook. Wasn’t really sure that I was ready to watch it, however I’m glad that I did. I’m sorry for your loss, yet glad that you had the time that you did with him. I know that it’s hard to get through loss as in 2008/2009 I lost 4 members of my family (including my dad and his siblings), mostly to various forms of cancer. He would have been 77 this year and I miss him greatly.

  14. Gail says:

    Hi Mandy, I am from Montreal, Quebec in Canada. I just wanted you to know that I showed this video at our church to the teen class when we were talking about Philippians 4:7
    “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” I thought Zac’s attitude exemplified this verse well. I let them know that Zac is now with he Lord.

    When I asked the teens what they liked about the video or what stood out to them. One 13 year old said that she was struck by him saying that if he lived or died God is still good and God is in control. Another 13 year old commented on how Zac talked about how the Cancer was a gift from God and that it made him a better husband, dad and more. It god them thinking and talking.

    Anyhow… I’m sure there are many people in other countries – teenagers, and adults alike – who your husband is helping make the word of God come alive to who don’t let you know. I guess there is a lot you will find out in heaven about the impact Zac’s story has made.

    I found your video through a friend who posted this video on her blog because her husband is the same age as yours, she also has three boys and had been married the same amount of time as you guys. So it got her thinking about if her attitude would be like Zac’s if she had to go through that.

    I have been married 12 years and my husband is 30 and we have two kids, so it got me thinking too!

    Likewise it made me wonder about your story right now. That is how I found this blog.
    It’s great to see you continuing with this and your life is being used by God to bring Him glory as well. It was not just Zac’s story God wanted to use for his glory, but yours and each one of your children too.

    My heart breaks for your loss, even though I have never met you, but I wanted to send some encouragement your way today.
    May God continue to give you daily strength and healing and comfort, and joy.

  15. |isa says:

    Hi Mandy,

    I am a 20 year o|d student and I was strugg|ing with what it means to trust God this year. Your husband’s video and yours as we|| were just so inspiring to me, to know that we trust God period. Because he is God and he is good…I am showing the video at my church tonight and I just want to thank you and Zac so much for making it and spreading your incredib|e story, |etting others |earn from your suffering and joy.


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