First of all, I would like to say thank you again, to everyone who has been so encouraging. The comments I have received have been just wonderful.
This week has been good. Yet, today was hard. I am not really sure why. Nothing happened or didn’t happen to make it a hard day. It just was. Such is mourning, I suppose. I took the kids to the pool, we played and ate Sonic. In the car I looked at them all hot and sweaty and happy. It made my heart swell with love. I am so proud of my kids. I am so thankful for them. I talked to them about how happy I am that we are so close as a family. That in the history of families, we will be one of the top contenders of “Closest Family” Which made them chuckle. I meant it.
Each night I have one of the kids sleep in the bed with me. Before they fall asleep, we whisper, cuddle, and laugh. I have started to love these quiet moments in the night. I find out little pieces about them and their thoughts. So happy to have that time.
Tonight it was Luke’s turn. As we snuggled up, he said he had something really neat to tell me. With wide eyes, he told me that he just knows something big is coming. He said that he feels like his life will be something big. I said, “what do you think it is?” His reply, “I don’t know but God sure does. And it will be huge. I can feel it in my heart.” I went on to tell him that Daddy’s story is his too. That there is purpose in all of this. That I pray for him to be a mighty man of God, that will tell others about Jesus. Every time I said something new, his smile got bigger and bigger. We ended our conversation by Luke telling me that he is excited. I am too, Luke. I am too.
Funny how God takes our hard and difficult days and uses them to soften our hearts. Almost molding them for great purpose. Today at the end of it all, I am thankful for the tough days. Almost as much as the wonderful ones He brings. Without rain, how would the fields get watered. Without water for the fields, nothing could grow.