On Memorial Day, I enjoyed a quiet day at home with the kids. Mandy was feeling ill so I made sure she slept much of the day. The kids and I decided to play Monopoly that morning. This turned out to be a wonderful experience where I learned some things about the kids and about humanity.

We played one game of Monopoly (Star Wars Clone Wars Version) and it took just about three hours to complete. Afterwards I reflected on how I was able to last that long with the kids and then I realized it was a much greater feat that they were able to retain their attention for that long. I still do not understand how that happened, but given my recent condition, I am quite grateful for the time I get to spend with them.

I learned that all three of my kids are manipulative. We played in such a way that at any point in the game, on said player’s turn, a player could make an offer to sell and/or buy property from one another. Almost every turn there were deals that were being attempted. Lizzy, especially, was ruthless in her dealings. I had to step in as legal counsel on most of the transactions to ensure some level of fairness.

I learned that Jake is a minimalist. He focused all his energy on buying one set of properties and then getting cities (hotels) on each of them. Luke, on the other hand, was happier to simply buy as many properties as possible. Lizzy was more focused on the spaceships (railroads) and the medical stations (utiltities). All this made for an interesting dynamic.

Jake wiped Lizzy out first and then he wiped me out shortly thereafter. He then wanted to stop the game and call himself the winner. I explained that Luke still had a fighting chance of winning. They played for a while longer and then Lizzy took over for Jake. In the end, Luke completely dominated. I do not take it lightly that the box says the game is for ages eight and up; Luke is six.

Perhaps the observation that hit me the hardest was how Luke wanted his cash stash to look. Each of us sat on one side of the board and had our money and properties neatly arranged along that side. I remember on one of Luke’s turns how he asked me if I wanted to complete a monopoly; he had one property and I had the other two. The property was originally worth 300 Republic Credits. I expressed my interest. He looked at my collection of money and said, “I will give it to you for all of your fifties and all of your twenties.” I looked down and noticed I had two of each equalling 140 credits. I began to explain to him the unfairness of that deal when I noticed his stacks of money. He did not have any fifties or twenties, but he had some of all the others: ones, fives, tens, hundreds, five hundreds. He just wanted some twenties and fifties. He wanted to trade me something he knew was valuable to me for something that was valuable to him. That which was valuable to him was not fair market value — I would have paid much more than the 300 list price to complete the monopoly (I ended up paying 500, I believe). He was less concerned with what the market value was and more concerned with an unmeasurable personal value. He wanted to complete his collection; he wanted to appear complete.

I later reflected on that manner of thinking. I know that Luke understands the concept of money although he is clearly still learning about how that all works. But there is something ingrained in him that needs no teaching or explanation. He simply wants to appear complete. When he looks down at his stacks of money, he wants to see every placeholder filled. He does not want emptiness. Is that not how many of us act with regards to our spirituality?

Do we not look at our spiritual life and simply try to fill the empty slots with whatever we can — even if it is not truly valuable? We talk, for example, about having a relationship with God. We say that the best way to have a relationship with Him is to spend time with Him and that pretty much means we spend time reading our Bible and praying. In other words, we spend time in communication with God. But how many times have I looked back on the last week or month and realized there are empty holes? It seems all-too-frequent that I look back on the past couple of days and feel guilty for not really spending any time in that relationship. So what do I do? I try to fill that empty hole as quickly as possible with anything I can get my hands on. I am no longer concerned with the “market value” of my time — I am simply wanting to fill that void.

The void never gets filled, though, does it? As long as we think that way, it will always be a void.

When I think about my wife and my children and I ponder the inevitable question of how much time I have left on this earth, I always come to the same conclusion: I want to spend as much time as possible with them. I do not count the time anymore in minutes or hours; I simply spend the time. When I plan on taking Lizzy out for a milkshake, I no longer think, “This should take forty-five minutes.” It could take thirty minute or it could take two hours. It does not really matter. I simply spend the time. In other words, I am focusing on the market value of spending time with my daughter instead of focusing on filling some void I feel in my heart.

The market value of spending time with one of my children, or my wife, is almost incalculable. It seems to me that spending time with the Creator would be the same. But to come back to the Monopoly game, I wonder if there are not times in our life when we can assess our stacks and simply be comfortable with one of them being empty. Should we really be focused on being so perfectly rounded? Is it even possible to attain that?

We are commanded to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, all of our soul, all of our strength, and all of our minds. Maybe we should realize that the Lord our God gave us our specific heart, soul, strength and mind. It is with those — that He gave to us — that we are to love Him with. I am not to love Him with your mind or your heart, but rather with my own. That may mean that my spiritual cash stash has some holes in it. It will probably also mean that my spirituality will look different than yours. And I am OK with that.

Tags: jake, Lizzy, luke, Monopoly, spirituality

This entry was posted by zac on Sunday, May 31st, 2009 at 7:37 pm and is filed under Weekly Jib Jab. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.